Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Goddamn Rule of Three's

Good thing i have another juicy thought to share: my gum has lost it's flavor. But i am happy to report that i have a whole pack here. Also that Stride gum has the most effective packaging that i've seen in a while. Thanks to it's wrap around lid, i dont spill all of my gum into my bag. That can be frustrating.

Listen, i know you are bored with this. It's not Josephine's fault. Rule of three's. Popples.

Tuna Crunch

Do you guys like tuna sandwiches? Of course you do. Dont pull that "i don't like mayonnaise" crap cause everyone like mayonnaise they just think they shouldn't cause it looks like something you shouldn't like. This is what you should do:

  • Open can of tuna (in water, you have to draw the line somewhere)
  • Mix in some mayo
  • Add the other stuff you like to add and then...
  • Take that almost finished bag of LIME Tostitos and pour it into the mix
  • Enjoy your delicious sandwich

This solves a lot of problems. The little pieces of chip at the bottom of the bag are so small that they are difficult to grasp. Pouring the crumbs in your mouth has its drawbacks (both physical and social/phychological). You CANNOT just throw the bag out with perfectly good crumbs left. Go ahead. Make yourself an awesome tuna sandwich.

Hold Up

Did you guys think Karen was going to dominate this blog? You were right. BUT Josephine ain't gonna just wilt on the vine. That is for old grapes.



The first problem that happens is knowing how to log in. If you cant log in you cant share thoughts.



Second problem: Thoughts. Josephine has them but they dont linger enough to come out. They turn into other thoughts, then they tell her to make some food. Once that happens, Josephine's day is over.



Third Problem: Why do we have to do everything in 3's? We dont.



Shit, we just did!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Reviews Are In!

"Like a dream come true. Standing next to Josephine is like being able to look into the arch of covenant without the whole crumbling into dust deal"

"Josephine is a foxy lady"

"Josephine Synclare Hooftoolan is my best friend"

"Josephine is so super great. I would totes bag do anything she says"

"I take a deep breath and look into my future, and images of Josephine wearing a wedding dress, birthing my children, and dying in my arms flash all around the insides my eyelids."

"Josephine, who? Oh her? Yeah, she coo."

Friday, March 20, 2009

Our Dead Friend Annabel

Annabel: i just found a chip
hiding in a magazine
and i ate it

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

farts

someone just farted and it smells like poop. (it was me)

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Hiaku(es)

Hi, name is karen
Tostitos are great
I eat them a lot

Do you get lonely?
Not me that's for sure, loserface
Go eat a sandwich

Rodney Dangerfield
He is a wonderful man
He eats tostitos*

*I can't prove it, but he would be an idiot not to

Jump jump jump jump jump
Jump jump jump jump jump jump jump
Jump jump jump jump jump

You go back to work!
No I will not, working sucks
Well fine, I don't want to do this any more either because I have to keep counting on my fingers and I look like an asshole.

Life Guard

The toliet seat liner at work is called "Life Guard". Thats a leettle dramatic, right?

Monday, March 9, 2009

Shawarma King

Shawarma King is good, everyone knows that. What catches my attention is their almost black magicish ability to fit an unreasonable amount of food into one little pita. I add every topping that is offered because I am a classically trained over-eater, and I am fully prepared to deal with the mess that should ensue from trying to have it all. Well swibble on my face. Those Kings are absolute masters of the pinch and fold. I didn’t drop a bite. And in round three, when I asked them to add the bag of LIME Tostitos to the mix, they were all “done” and I was all, “please marry me” and they were all, “I don’t understand English.”

Monday, March 2, 2009

We're here!

Hallo, and velcome. This is Karen and Josephine's special spot to share ideas, and golden nuggets.

Cincerely,
karen & josephine